Forgiveness Doesn't Stop With the Words ...I Forgive You!

Philemon 1:8-10 -  Now I want to ask a favor of you. I could demand it of you in the name of Christ because it is the right thing for you to do, but I love you and prefer just to ask you—I, Paul, an old man now, here in jail for the sake of Jesus Christ.  My plea is that you show kindness to my child Onesimus, whom I won to the Lord while here in my chains. 

In order to fully understand Paul’s request you need to know that Onesimus was Philemon’s slave.  He had run away for reasons we are not told…and somehow met Paul in prison. Paul was able to somehow convert this run-away slave to Christ…then convince him of his need to repair the relationship he had with his master. In order for Onesimus to complete his reconciliation…Philemon must forgive him and begin to see him as a brother in Christ instead of a slave that ran away.

The message in this story hit me hard folks. Its personal once again...but perhaps someone else will benefit from my disclosure.  I’ve been having dreams of someone that I know in my heart that I forgave. Since these dreams were of my first husband…and we divorced 5 years ago…they puzzled and bothered me on many levels. I pray each time I have one that God either stop them or reveal to me the reason behind them…so I can understand what they might be telling me I need to do. As soon as I read this story…I knew God was answering my prayers. Forgiveness doesn’t stop with the words…I forgive you.

Paul is telling all of us to go the next level with our forgiveness.  As hard as it might be for me to work toward some sort of relationship with my ex….God calls all of us to use our connection of Christ to develop each connection to one of his children.  I may not even benefit directly…but our children will see our effort to be connected for them and that will speak volumes to them and all the people that might have been affected by our decision to divorce.

The definition of reconciliation from the ‘google’ … an act of unification, as when former enemies agree to an amicable truce.  Amicable means friendly…and friends develop more than an agreement not to bother each other. Friends have a relationship formed over common ideas and interests…and three kids and 2 grandchildren are quite a lot in common. 

I will be honest and say that I have no clue what to do next…even though I have my answer from God why I should do it.  I know that it won’t be easy…but that is the nature of all answers from God that help us truly understand and grow in his love.  I know that it must not been easy for Christ to die on that cross to reconcile me to his father…so why should it be any easier for me.

Father…thank you for the reminder that forgiveness doesn’t stop with the words I forgive you.  Forgive me for making it so hard for you to help me understand that forgives requires reconciliation…and a redevelopment of the relationship that was damaged. Show me the next steps in how I am to repair and reestablish the relationship I dissolved in the choice to divorce. Use this new relationship to build your kingdom and help others grow in understanding of your love. Amen.